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New Years Hopes, Challenges & Choices 2017

What HOPES, CHANGES and CHOICES are you going to make this year?

It is another New Year and it is customary to make resolutions and commitments and look back on the past year.
We usually ask ourselves what we want to CHANGE this year and how are we going to get there. Did you manage to achieve what you set out to do in 2016? What did you celebrate and what can you improve upon this year?

I start thinking of what I want more of in my life. What possibilities can I envision?
What do I need to change in myself, my home or in my relationships. What do I want to learn, what do I want to do and what options & choices do I have. What are you hoping for in 2017?

I am feeling inspired by possibilities and thought you might want to join me in MAKING CHANGES.
Of course the BIG questions are:
WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE OF IN YOUR LIFE? WHAT DO YOU NEED GOING FORWARD TO BE HAPPY, HAVE BETTER RELATIONSHIPS or BE MORE SUCCESSFUL AT WORK?

What is the “IT” you are wanting, dreaming or needing more of……..
and
If you had “IT” How would your life be different? and
What is stopping you from having “IT”
This is where I can help you:

define what CHANGES you want to implement
clarify what BLOCKS you need to get past
create a MAP to achieve your goal
support you in the PROCESS 

What needs a TRANSFORMATION in your life?
Your personal or professional LIFE, your HOME or your RELATIONSHIPS?

LIFE, LOVE, LIFESTYLE 
Are you living “on purpose”
Do you feel inspired everyday?
What challenges are you facing?
Do you feel what you do is meaningful?
Are your relationships full of love or full of conflict?
Do you feel fulfilled? Are you happy?
What choices do you have?
Do you feel afraid?
Do you feel in sync with who you are at your core?
I can help you discover what you want more of in your life, support you to create a life that will feel more meaningful, full of love, less stressful, healthier, happier and more successful.

I will help you clarify your goals, define how to get there with a step by step plan and coach and support you to achieve it. I will help you solve challenges, turn conflicts into opportunities and highlight new perspectives and possibilities.

DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO DISCOVER WHAT CHANGES YOU NEED TO MAKE, TO HAVE MORE OF WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE
Let me know when you want to start your new life and book your Discovery Coaching Session
BOOK HERE
Mheyah

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The Power of APPRECIATION

Relationship Revolution- The Power of Appreciation by Mheyah Bailey

I have recently been re-inspired by witnessing the power of APPRECIATION
and reminded in a big way by an amazing couple I have met, the value and importance of APPRECIATION and how much LOVE really is an action word.

I have been living in the UK for the last 2 years and I have noticed the subtleties in the differences between Canadian and English communication styles, which has nothing to do with the differences in our accents, but more to do with the differences in our culture. It is so interesting that we can be so different considering we speak the same language.  I have found myself being acutely aware of what I say and how I say it and listening to people here with a new level of awareness. I will however leave this rather large topic for another newsletter, but instead focus today on a universal human commonality that is just as important here in the UK or Canada or Anywhere.
I was beautifully reminded by this young couple of how very, very, VERY important APPRECIATION is to the well being of ourselves individually, and how much expressing APPRECIATION positively impacts the happiness, fulfillment and security of relationships.
Everyday I am privileged to witness love and honoured to support people in their fears around the perceived loss of love, and all the complications that being in relationship brings to us. I teach couples how to get to the heart of the matter so they can create more connection, work collaboratively and remember why they chose each other in the first place. I welcome the challenges so people can learn more about themselves, each other, what they need and value and how to improve their communication so they can learn to celebrate differences, help them learn not to take things personally and make their relationships more positive, connected and full of love.

I will showAt the heart of this is that we all need to feel APPRECIATED, HEARD, ACKNOWLEDGED , RECOGNIZED and WITNESSED for all that makes us SPECIAL & UNIQUE, for the things we do everyday and the contributions we make in large and small ways personally, professionally or globally. It doesn’t matter how you contribute or what you do or what motivates you, whether it is cooking a meal so your family can eat, getting up that one extra time at night with the baby so your partner can have some valuable sleep, going out everyday to work to support the family, speaking at the UN on some new important policy that will impact the safety of the world, running the government, building houses, setting broken bones, creating art, designing technology……………………….. We are all motivated to do the things we do, by many diverse personal needs and values whether it is love, commitment, responsibility, money, creativity or intellect and so many other motivators, some positive and some not so much.
I imagine that you understand to some degree that we all get a sense of personal fulfillment in one way or another from making those choices to do what we do, as we all have hopes, values, needs and dreams and our actions are in service of fulfilling those, however, what I witnessed the other day was how important it is to be APPRECIATED by those around us and especially from those we love and care about.

“Nothing is done in this world without hope” MLK jr

In my experience in life, personally and professionally, it seems to be such an important ingredient to feel APPRECIATED and to have HOPE of that eventuality, which to most of us equates to feeling LOVED.
I witnessed a couple I am privileged to be coaching, such a compelling understanding of the importance of feeling APPRECIATED, that I am convinced that one of the main reasons relationships break down is because of this lack of feeling APPRECIATED, whether it is a couple, family, friend or professional relationship.
Our level of satisfaction and fulfillment will undoubtedly suffer because of a lack of appreciation. The majority of people who look outside their relationships, look for new jobs or a change in circumstances, generally are looking for appreciation, understanding and a connection for which they feel is lacking in their current relationships or situations.
love-and-appreciation
Dr. John Gottman from his Love Lab research, says that our interactions with others needs to be a ratio of 6 positive engagements to one negative, and if the balance is off there will be a definite decline in the quality and satisfaction in the relationship.

It really doesn’t take a lot to show APPRECIATION which is a close cousin to good old fashioned manners. Psychology teaches us that people are motivated to contribute to the greater good and feeling appreciated and valued for what we contribute is the currency for feeling fulfillment and happiness. It doesn’t mean that we need to have appreciation to contribute, it just means that it can be more fulfilling and meaningful and ensure our continued interest in contributing if we do. OK I admit it, I am not Mother Theresa and I really value knowing I made a difference in someone’s life. I am far more motivated by APPRECIATION than money 🙂
So judge me if you will but I think APPRECIATION is a very important human need and I think we can all forget to show our appreciation for others and fall into the trap of taking our relationships for granted. So if LOVE is an ACTION word, APPRECIATION is the currency for fulfillment, and we need to keep the balance of a 6 to 1 ratio of positive to negative, then how are you going to show your appreciation to others today.

appreciation-dayHere are some suggestions.
1. Notice and acknowledge a job completed
2. Say thank you to someone for the difference they make in your life, even the little things, because the little things are really important. (I think I may not have thanked my husband for bringing me tea in bed every morning)
3. Doing the APPRECIATION exercise. Three things I really appreciate about you today is……….and this works great with your children (or employees) and helps build their confidence, self esteem and their trust in their value to their community or family in the case of ones children
4. Do something for someone without expectation of anything in return
5. Give positive feedback ie: Wow the dinner is amazing. Thank you for making it for us or thank you for ensuring those emails got out or….
6. Send a card to thank someone for something you really value they do or did for you
7. Hug people you care about, hug people just because…..
8. Say I love you and WHY you love them, not just the 3 words but add what it is about them that you value, admire and respect.
9. Call, text or email just because you want to positively connect
10. Notice all the jobs that get done and mention that you noticed
11. Leave a note of appreciation for someone to find. It’s called A NICE NOTE!
12. Use reflective listening so others know you really heard them

Try this process for acknowledgement. When you do……….I really feel………because it meets my needs and values for……..In your own words of course 🙂

I hope you have enjoyed this newsletter and would love to hear back how showing APPRECIATION impacted your day?

I deeply appreciate your time and letting me share some thoughts with you and thank you to the couple that inspired this article. You know who you are.
love Mheyah 

Please connect with me at
 www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

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twitter@mheyahbailey
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Please sign up below for important and valuable information to help you succeed in your relationships

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HAPPINESS PROJECT 101


Do you feel like you need a life makeover and don’t know where to start? Have you had some disappointments, losses, big changes, don’t know what to do? There are some missing pieces and you aren’t sure what they are or you just aren’t where you want to be in life yet? Having relationship issues, conflict, upsets, feeling disconnected or worse apathy has set in. You don’t feel like you know each other and feel all alone even though you are in a relationship.

Together, I will support, encourage and coach you through a JOURNEY OF DISCOVERY & TRANSFORMATION to wholeness & happiness. We will identify the necessary changes you need to move on to a life you envision for yourself, discover the missing pieces and learn new skills so you will be successful in all areas of your life personally and professionally. This program will help you feel happier, more at peace, have more loving relationships with less conflict and uncover your true heart’s calling and life purpose.

This is an EXCLUSIVE TRANSFORMATIVE COURSE for dedicated life changers. It is a hands on proactive coaching program that supports you to move from A to “WHEREVER YOU WANT” and includes, coaching with me one on one, your time and commitment, reading and homework until you are finished the course. We will not stop until you are where you want to be and have created the life you are envisioning for yourself.
TAKES APPROXIMATELY 6-10 WEEKS TO CREATE YOUR NEW LIFE

The program will help you CREATE an INSPIRED LIFE and I will support you to make your life an authentic expression of who you are from the INSIDE OUT.
This coaching course will guide you to get past what is holding you back from integrating all aspects of your magnificence into a life fully integrated with who you are at a core level.

“to live a conscious & inspired life one must use the wisdom of the heart & the power of the mind”
We will explore what you need to change to have a life full of more LOVE, HAPPINESS, FULFILLMENT, PURPOSE & BEAUTY.
We will unlock the keys to your fabulous delicious life.

Change can be so much easier with a coach, an advocate, a mentor, a champion.  I am committed to support, inspire, encourage and collaborate with you to create the life you want and I will help you leap into the life of your dreams.

Let me ask you:
Who are you being when facing life’s challenges?

Are you in touch with who you are and what you need?
Are you holding yourself back or seizing the opportunities?
Are you letting fear make your choices?
Are you able to communicate so you are heard and understood?
Are you living your best and most authentic self?
Are you feeling happy, fulfilled and successful?
Are your relationships healthy and full of love?
Are you living in integrity with your values?
Does your environment reflect who you are?
Does your lifestyle support your health and well being: emotionally, physically, spiritually?

How you answer these questions demonstrates your level of confidence, knowledge of yourself, your character and whether you have the right skills for a successful and happy life.  I will support you to create new empowering beliefs & behavior patterns that inspire confidence and move you toward your goals.
We will learn more about your values and how living in integrity with your values creates inner happiness and we will explore and eliminate self-destructive habits that are keeping you stuck.

I will teach you how to communicate authentically & effectively everywhere in your life so you feel confident and self assured in positive outcomes in all your relationships personally and professionally.
We will create a vision for your life and turn it into a reality so your life reflects who you are at your very core.

Please connect with me  to learn more.
Book your session below

or Register here for the course
DATE: AS SOON AS YOU ARE READY TO GET HAPPIER & CREATE A NEW LIFE
TIMES: YOUR CHOICE
WHERE: ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, NORTH SHORE, VANCOUVER, YOUR OFFICE, IN PERSON, SKYPE, PHONE
EMAIL: mheyah@gmail.com

REGISTER FOR THE EXCLUSIVE HAPPINESS PROJECT 101 – $2999.00
OR 4 EQUAL PAYMENT PLANS OF $750 OVER 4 MONTHS.

 

Love Mheyah ♥

Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
instagram@connectionpoint
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Work with Mheyah
Skype Me™!Skype Mheyah

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Life & Love is all in the Details


Successful Communication Made Simple Series by Mheyah Bailey
How Curiousity is one of the 5 Important Principles for Creating Amazing Relationships

How can we make everything in life truly amazing? How can we create Radical Relationships with intensity and passion that are truly an authentic expression of our individuality and our togetherness? It is all in the details.

I just spent a fabulous week in France taking in and enjoying all the sensorial delights and ambiance of the beautiful countryside, villages, history and all of details that make up a truly inspiring French lifestyle, from the simple salutations in every shop, to expressing oneself with hand gestures, kissing on both sides of the cheek, dining al fresco with the silverware and good china, the je ne sais quoi of the fashionista, food grown in the garden or shopped for in the market, music and fragrances of walnut oil and honeysuckle in the air, the curiosity and gratitude for the joie de vivre. Sigh…….DSC_3040
As I was planning this article about the importance and benefits of curiousity in our relationships and lives, it dawned on me this week that life and love is all in the details and a curious mind is a necessity for finding the details, the nuances, the deeper meaning and enjoyment of anything. Curiousity creates an intimate connection with people and life.

I love writing and coaching about love, life and happiness and hope that you will use all the information I share with you to make your life more fulfilling and purposeful and that it helps you create amazing relationships full of connectedness and passion with your partners and in life. It really is all in the details.
If we are to Create truly Successful Relationships and a fulfilling life we need to understand that curiousity is one of those important principles that will help us define the details, so we can uncover the meaning and importance of deeper understanding through authentic discovery. Without using the gift of curiousity we will live a life of mediocrity and miss out on a deeper and more meaningful understanding of oneself and true intimacy with others.

Socrates said “an unexamined life is not worth living”

In the series for Creating Successful Communication we have been discussing what it means to actually integrate the 5 Principles for Successful Communication. We have discussed what it means to be Conscious and how we can become more aware of our responsibility in our lives and the impact we have personally, professionally and globally.
I believe that Compassion is an essential principle for any healthy relationship, which you can read about HERE.
truth

Going forward we are going to delve more into the principles Curiousity, Courage and Commitment, so hopefully you will see the positive benefits those qualities can bring to your life and relationships.

So what does it mean to be CURIOUS?

CURIOUS:[kyoor-ee-uhs] ADJECTIVE: eager to learn, understand or know; to be inquisitive, arousing or exciting speculation, interest, or attention through being different or unknown; an inquiring open mind interested & seeking to know and understand; to wonder.

We are all born curious, it is a natural quality we all possess. Curiousity is what makes us humans learn to crawl, seek, taste, see, experience, create, philosophize, dream, explore, change. Curiousity is foundational to all creativity and is an essential principle to creating successful relationships.

Why you might ask? Well if you aren’t curious in life and love then you limit yourself to only what you know already. That will be the limit of your experience and understanding. To seek to understand more is an exceedingly important quality in your relationships because we can never truly understand another persons experience without delving deeper. It is important to not believe we actually know what anyone else is experiencing and to be ever so gently open and non-judgmentally curious.

In a previous article I wrote how curiousity will benefit your relationships:

“I believe it is invaluable to be deeply interested in what another person is trying to express with no agenda other than to understand, and in turn being deeply curious about yourself, what you are feeling and what you need to express as well.
Being curious shows that you care, that you are interested; that how the other person feels is important to you and that they are important to you.
While being curious you need to be able to listen without judgment or interrupting. Listening means to be silent and that your brain is entirely engaged with the other person’s experience and how they are feeling as they struggle to express what is going on for them, while also being mindful of your own feelings and responses.

It is helpful to stop yourself from knowing or assuming anything. It means that you remain an open blank slate without making assumptions that you already know and understand what others are trying to express.
Curiousity means that you are remembering that none of what is being said is personal and means you are LISTENING INTENTLY to what is being said, what is happening, what has caused the happy feelings or upset, what the other persons values are, what is important to them and how they want or need something to be different so they will be happier and your relationship will improve, personally or professionally.
This is an important detail about curious conversations; ask questions that help define what is needed, what is important to the other person and why.
Nothing in the world is done without meeting a need and defining what others need is what builds connection and compatibility. A need could be as simple as desiring more tidiness, help with dinner or as fundamental as wanting to feel more respected, but all worthy of our time, curiousity, compassion, cooperation and collaboration to resolve.
It is so important to check out what is going on for another person, make sure what you heard is what was intended, and do your best to understand what is important, what they need and are asking for.  Curiousity builds trust if you are truly seeking to understand someone else with an open compassionate heart.

If you can stay curious even in times of stress, you are on the road to positive healthy relationships. Curiousity helps you stay present to what is happening, what is trying to happen and collaboratively decide what needs to happen going forward. Being curious about the people we are in relationships with, how they experience life, understanding and appreciating their perspective is the key to love in personal relationships and builds collaborative professional relationships creating an unbreakable bond of positive connection and mutual respect”

It is important to reflect our understanding back to people so they know we have understood their answers. It is simple to repeat back what you think you have heard which lets the other person hear you were really listening and understood the details and nuances of what was being said. If we inadvertently missed out any important parts then our “curious minds” can remain open to further information that clarifies what the other person is trying to convey.
Questions can often times sound judgmental or like a criticism so it can be helpful to not use the word “why” but instead to use open questions that start with “what” and “how”:

What happened?
What is that like?Speaking
How do you feel?
What is important about that to you?
What do you need?
Can you help me understand?
How can I help?

There is a caveat to curiousity that I believe is important to mention as your curiousity must be connected with your awareness of yourself and is not meant to be an interrogation from fear or judgment. That is why authentic curiousity takes practice and an attitude of “open hearted wanting to understand” rather than fearful interrogation. I hope you can understand the difference and realize that sometimes we all need to monitor ourselves and that curiousity must have no other agenda than seeking to know more or to understand better with the intention to create positive connection.
With every connection we make it can be so useful to ask if you are creating positive connection or disconnection.

When I say that happiness in life and love is in the details I really mean it is in the details. We mustn’t just accept a superficial limited perspective if we want to feel happier and have more intimate connections to our partners, our friends and colleagues. Humans are complex individuals and attending with non-judgmental open hearted curiousity we can strive to understand people in a more authentic meaningful way.
Curiousity can help you achieve more connection by inviting more detailed information. As humans we present ourselves, our conversations and concerns about 6 layers above where the more meaningful truth is, which means the majority of the time we are not necessarily attuned to what is really driving our complaint or concern.
It is a gift of our time and presence to be curious, whether someone is experiencing a happy moment or a trauma. The impact is priceless as your simple presence and curiousity makes others feel appreciated and important and is that not after all what we all need in life; to love and feel loved. Curiousity is a loving act and love is in the details.
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It isn’t only important to be curious about others but equally as important to be curious about yourself. According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs it is one of our main human needs to grow and evolve, and how could we achieve that if we did not use our curiousity. To be curious about oneself is one of the most important qualities we need to create a purposeful and fulfilling life. It is in seeking and clarifying the details of our own needs and values that compels us to live a more authentic expression of ourselves creating more purpose and fulfillment and happy peaceful relationships. How could we discover what is important to ourselves without curiousity? We couldn’t.
It is the act of asking ourselves the important questions that wakes us up and gives us choice to create the life we really want. Curiousity is about defining your dreams and goals and then making a conscious choice to pursue your life with gusto and passion. This is a big conversation best left for the next time but in the meantime I hope you can see the value of curiousity for your life and all your relationships.

Try it out and see what happens. I look forward to hearing what impact curiousity has in your life.

Love Mheyah 
Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
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“5 Simple Steps to Successful Communication”

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ARE YOU LIVING ON PURPOSE?

 

Are you living “on purpose”
Do you feel what you do is meaningful?
Do you feel fulfilled?
Do you feel in sync with who you are at your core?
Would you like to contribute more?
What is important to you?
Do you feel inspired everyday?

Do you sometimes wonder what you should do with your life? This is an important life question most of us ask ourselves at some point. The search for meaning is part of our human evolution. Do you ever ask yourself: What should I do with my life? What is my purpose in life? What am I passionate about? What inspires me? What would be meaningful?

I am a Conscious Living Lifestyle Consultant,Counsellor and Coach and I trust and know that the answers are within you. I am only here to help ask you the right questions and support you to discover the truth that is inside you so you can live your purposeful life.

The first step is learning more about you.
I know what it is like not to know what direction to go in. I went through a program long before I became a coach where at the end I came out with my “Purpose Statement” and it is what I live everyday. It is who I am and is my mission statement in life. I have been through much soul-searching, crisis and diversions and now have a fulfilling, purposeful and meaningful life because I am in alignment with my values, passions and skills. My life is now a complete reflection of who I am and who I was born to be and I want the same for you. What I teach and how I coach is entirely because of all of my life experiences and I want to share with you how you can live your own purposeful life.

This is entirely a journey of personal discovery, illuminating who you are born to be and what you are meant to contribute. It is not necessarily about doing a specific job but it is about living your most authentic self, integrating your core values, needs, passions & gifts. It really is about living your own mission statement everyday.

I can help you discover your purpose in life as we go through a process of discovering the answers to some important questions.
Answer the “Discovering your Life Purpose” questions and begin the journey of living your purpose.
Click here to sign up for a free “Discovering Your Purpose” questionnaire

My purpose is: I am a  lovable & trusting woman inspiring & collaborating with others to create conscious loving relationships through heart centred connection & communication
I created that purpose statement before I became a coach and counsellor and it personifies who I am at my very core. I live that everyday whether I am working or not. It is just who I am. Thank you Choices

Love Mheyah 

If you would like to connect. Book your discovery session below

Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com
cell: +1-778-952-4797
facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
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Work with Mheyah 


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SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS START WITH YOU


Successful Communication Made Simple Series by Mheyah Bailey
Also published on Metro LivingZine

Over the next few weeks I want to share with you the importance of improving our communication. It all starts with learning more about ourselves rather than anything else, and I want to look at that in more detail with you so you can get a better idea of the steps it takes to be a stellar communicator.
Now the reason I believe this to be so important is that if we can all learn to express ourselves from a deeper understanding of what we want and need, and why we want and need it, then truly we will all experience less conflict & misunderstandings in our lives and a lot more cooperation, appreciation and loving harmony.
I believe that communication is an equal opportunity skill for all areas of our lives, whether personal or professional and is a skill that will improve our intimate relationships, families will be healthier, communities more collaborative and nations more united.
I do like to say that being a stellar Communicator is really all about lots of “C” words, Curiousity, Consciousness, Compassion, Connection, Collaboration, Control, Consideration, Care………..no I wasn’t thinking Chocolate, but having said that isn’t everyone more agreeable when eating chocolate? LOL
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So for today we are going to start with the “C” word Consciousness which really is only a trendy new age word for personal awareness so don’t let the word scare you off the good information.

So what does being CONSCIOUS mean?
CONSCIOUSNESS: (kon-shuhs-nis) NOUN: to understand the deeper meaning of what you think and feel
It is about really noticing and becoming aware of your own feelings, reactions and responses. Relationships are inside work and the people around us are only triggers for us to notice how we are feeling, what has made us feel that way, what values are being prodded, what needs are being compromised, what story are we telling ourselves about an event, comment or conversation.

Our reactions and feelings are entirely made up from what we think and the perspective we have told ourselves about it. I do love to say “don’t believe everything you think” and the reason is that what we think is shaped by our past experiences good and bad. If we don’t have a thought then we won’t have a feeling or reaction, and that feeling is most likely based on thoughts that are probably not unbiased thoughts, but a collection of conclusions we learned since childhood and through past hurts where we have learned to deny our needs, values and primary emotions.
For instance one person can hear a comment or view an event completely differently than you, based on your different experiences with the words, what happened, where they were said, how they were said, the context etc and both of you could easily draw up completely different conclusions, neither right or wrong, just different.
Your job is to notice what story, or tape you have running in the background that filters all the messages you get from others. Once you notice your thoughts and the FEELINGS that come up from the interaction you can get clearer on what those FEELINGS mean to you. I know I am using the “F” word but seriously our FEELINGS are our barometer for what we really need and value and when we are able to tune into them we have done the first part to learning how to communicate better with the purpose of living more authentically & truthfully with ourselves and others. The impact of being able to do this is you will be able to live your life more in line with your real needs and values not from the unconscious drivers from the past.

The intention of the consciousness exercise is to then be able to express how you feel to another person in a calm and clear way, which in turn builds connection, trust and a greater understanding between you, BUT that is for another lesson, so for now as we explore all aspects of communication I would like to invite you to NOTICE what you FEEL when something or someone is “triggering” you and what thoughts or story came up before you had a reaction. Work backwords. Do your best to just be aware of yourself and we will talk about how to share it with others later on in the series.

To learn more about emotions and feelings here is an excellent article to help you CLICK HERE

loveLove Mheyah ♥ 
Please connect with me at 

www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com
facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
instagram@mheyahbailey
pinterest@mheyahbailey

Find out more about Mheyah 

 

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Creating Successful Relationships


Successful Communication Made Simple- A Series of Conversations

by Mheyah Bailey

“the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives”

This is the beginning of a series about how we can all Create more Successful Relationships. At Connection Point Centre we believe that excellent communication can be learned and is the key to living happy, loving and successful lives. This is where I believe we can change the world, positively connecting, personally, professionally and globally, one conversation at a time.


"connect"

Studies show that 85% of our happiness & success in life can be directly attributed to our communication skills

The atmosphere of all our relationships is determined entirely on our ability to communicate and how we exchange ideas, thoughts and feelings, how we manage our own reactivity, appreciate others’ perspectives, listen, solve conflict and express our own needs and values. How we communicate controls what our lives are like and whether we feel happy, fulfilled, have loving relationships and are successful personally and professionally, or whether we experience conflict, disharmony, disconnection, unhappiness and feel misunderstood, unfulfilled, alone and unappreciated.

Every day we live and work with other people who have different opinions, values, beliefs, and needs than our own, so having the ability to communicate effectively with others is what will create more love, happiness and success in all areas of our lives.

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I believe that as human beings one of our most basic needs is to be heard, understood, appreciated, feel loved and bond with others, and that learning how to express our beliefs, thoughts, feelings and needs is as important as water and breathing. Learning the fine art of communication earlier in life would mean that many of us would have been able to avoid a lot of pain in our lives from the lack of understanding ourselves and each other.

The act of communicating not only involves the words we choose, but how we say the words, our tone and body language. Our use of language and being mindful of a desired outcome has tremendous power in the type of atmosphere that is created during moments of emotional conflict. Words that are critical, blaming, judgmental or accusatory tend to create resistance and defensiveness that is not conducive to productive problem solving or loving respectful connection. On the other hand, we can choose words that are softer, more positive and compassionate and have an element of personal responsibility that will lead to clearer understanding and positive loving connection.

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The truth is relatively simple and successful communication requires that we state our point of view, our feelings, values and needs as succinctly and as clearly as possible with a foundation of copious quantities of heartfelt authenticity and compassion.

Are you experiencing conflict with your partner, your children and your colleagues at work?
Are you feeling misunderstood and not appreciated?
Do you want to feel more loved?
Do you not feel happy and don’t even know why?
Do you feel blamed and criticized?
Are you not enjoying life?
Is your partner distant and unresponsive?
Are you not where you want to be in your career?
Are you feeling unfulfilled and purposeless?
Do you not know how to ask for what you want?
Are you afraid to speak up for yourself? 

“If you do what you have always done you will get what you have always got”

Speaking

I believe there are 5 principles that are necessary for stellar communication, Consciousness, Compassion, Curiousity, Courage and Commitment which we will discuss in greater detail in the series and I will also share with you
the 5 Simple Steps for Creating Successful Communication: Intentions, Observations, Feelings, Values, Requests.
The place to start learning how to become more successful in your relationships is by getting to know yourself better, becoming conscious of the impact you have on others and becoming personally responsible for your part in any interaction, learning to manage your emotions, anxiety and reactivity. Combine all that with stellar communication skills and you can create the life you have always dreamed of personally, professionally and globally.
10 Reason to Improve Communication

Connection Point Centre specializes in teaching communication skills that create connection and harmony, resolves conflict, improves relationships through heart to heart conversations, team building through authentic expression and collaboration, coaching dynamic cultures and creating more love, happiness and success in all areas of your life.

“What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on a mutual giving from the heart” – Dr. Marshall Rosenberg NVC

loveLove Mheyah ♥ 
Please connect with me at www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

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Find out more about Mheyah 

 

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HAPPY-NESS is an Inside Job

And Now for Something Completely Different
Also published on MetroLivingZine

We are taking a break this week from our Creating Successful Relationships series Instead I have written a lifestyle list for HAPPY-NESS because relationships are really inside work and you are responsible for your health and happiness, no one else.

It can be a challenging concept to understand that relationships are inside work and I don’t mean just our love relationships, but all relationships. It is our own responsibility to make ourselves happy, follow our own paths to passion, creativity and fulfillment and not blame others for our unhappiness. All our connections teach us about ourselves and need us to grow into our best selves to flourish, so for a change lets look at ourselves, and what we can do to make ourselves happier.

Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony – Thomas Merton.

Happiness and living an inspired and conscious life can only be achieved if there is balance between the physical BODY, spiritual SOUL and emotional MIND.

BE committed, DO what it takes, to HAVE what you want-Choices International

RECIPE for a HAPPY LIFE

Happiness Recipe

Physical-BODY

Get plenty of exercise, movement and fresh air. Men need a minimum of 3 times a week and women need up to 5 times a week of regular exercise. New studies have said we are healthier if we get 450 minutes a week of exercise which equate to roughly and hour a day. That is where walking a dog could help J
The benefits of exercise are widely known including physical and mental health on many levels. Our bodies are meant to move and express themselves. Movement keeps our hearts healthy, our weight in balance, our bones strong and creates endorphins for happiness, so if you want to feel better all the way around then start moving, whatever way feels inspiring to you.  If you can’t manage to stay committed and need help, hire a coach, a trainer, get an exercise buddy or figure out what is stopping you. Exercise decreases depression, improves sleep, reduces stress and elevates self-esteem while building strong bodies, bones and strengthens immunity. So get out and Swim, Ski, Run, Yoga, Pilates, Dance, Cycle, Run, Walk, Hike………Doesn’t matter what it is “just do it” as the saying goes. Thank you Nike.

Eat healthier. Buy quality whole foods, cook responsibly for heart health and nourishment and then balance your caloric intake with your exercise. Don’t eat junk or processed food. Eat at regular intervals to maintain a healthy glycemic index and eat 3 -4 small meals a day over eating one large one only at night and don’t eat late at night. You are what you eat, or so the saying goes.

Drink water
-5-8 glasses a day depending on your weight. Being dehydrated creates stress on the body so that your body does not run efficiently, builds up toxins, compromises digestion and creates fatigue.


Get sufficient rest
. We are a sleep-deprived culture. About eight hours of sleep is the minimum for the body to repair itself. You may personally need more or less, as sleep requirements vary between people but we do need adequate sleep to achieve our fullest potential. Don’t drink caffeine before bed, eat heavy foods or engage in mentally stimulating activity. Let your brain calm down and keep the lighting low for an hour before sleep and sweet dreams.


Find time to relax
. Just lie down, think positive thoughts, meditate or take up a relaxing hobby, socialize with people you love.


Do something creative.  
Pick a hobby or recreation that you enjoy as it will balance out daily stress. This is one of the most important aspects to happiness in my mind and is also one of the most important aspects for healthy relationships. It is vitally important to continue or find your creative centre for your relationships to thrive. When each person in any couple feels fulfilled creatively it will keep your relationship sparkling with enthusiasm and inspiration too.

Live somewhere that you love to come home to.
Create your SPECIAL SPACES
Surround yourself with beauty. 
At least what you consider to be beautiful

Emotional-MIND

Plan out your day and set goals. Remain flexible and try different approaches to your goals. Remember, sometimes life goes differently than you planned and you may not have time for everything. Just be productive in the time you have and do your best to not stress if you don’t accomplish everything just the way you planned. Perspective and positivity is important to ones well-being and sense of self-esteem. Formula for goal setting
S.M.A.R.T. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Timely

Find and develop your gifts and talents
. Go out and try activities to find what you are good at and what you love and feel passionate about. We are all good at something


Keep a diary or a journal.
 This would be a good place to write things out, talk about your thoughts and feelings. Process life as it happens. It will give you a memoir to share when you are older.


Read
. Try classics such as Shakespeare, Jane Austen, Montaigne, Proust, or Tolstoy. If you are not fond of those, try the newspaper, a fantasy novel, history, personal growth, bibliography, or mystery. There’s something for everyone- check out your local library or a bookstore. I love bookstores. So many books, so little time.


Think responsibly-
You are what you think, whether you believe you can or you can’t, it is the truth. See more about THINKING

Learn something new every day-
Whenever we learn something new, including new attitudes, perspectives, or behaviors, we are changing the physical structure of the brain.


Education. 
Be independent and self-supporting. Educate yourself, master the skills necessary for your advancement and ability to contribute. You will not be dependent upon anyone else and safety and security is a fundamental human need.


Appreciation makes you Happy.
 Money is not that important. Fulfillment and Purpose are the most important qualities to create happiness Remember rich people are no happier than average people. After ones basic needs are met people that have more money are not any happier than those without a lot of money.

Play, Laugh & then Laugh and Play some more
You can learn more about a man in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. It is essential to ones soul and physical well-being to laugh, play and be a kid again. Never lose your inner child.

"joy and happiness"
Communicate effectively-see all about communication and the importance of effective communication on your happinessCommunication 

Listen 
to others. There is difference between just hearing the words and actually paying attention, listening and understanding them.

Compassion is an essential ingredient to connecting with others and living a heart centered life.

Process-
Be with yourself and learn what your feelings are telling you. Let them inform you of the deeper meanings.  Before you react in anger understand that anger is only a secondary emotion and that the feelings underneath that inform us of needs and values that are being compromised. If we do not look within, we will go without. The wholeness of ourselves does not depend on our personalities but depends entirely on the awareness of our inner feelings.


Consciousness-“Don’t believe everything you think”
 but do know that to live consciously means using the wisdom of the heart and the power of the mind. Seek out like minded individuals, go to counselling, get a coach, have a growth buddy, support group, join groups, learn. It is our human journey to grow, heal and change.


Responsibility-
be “respons-able” means be responsible for how you behave, how you react, are you choosing fear or love, are you bullying anyone or not asking for what you need and want, where are you not showing up, giving up, acting angry, hiding in confusion, not looking after yourself, abusing………,

Authenticity-Means to be genuine and honest about who you are in this world. It is way less stressful to be oneself at all times. “If you aren’t going to be you, who is?” Sometimes to be ourselves requires courage as we may face judgment or criticism but to live an authentic life is surely something to strive for as it is the foundation for purpose, happiness, love, fulfillment and success.

Purpose– Your purpose is who you were born to be and how you live every dayFind your purpose and everything else will fall into place. See Purpose…..

Career-
To be happy, ones job has to be one you love. “Love it or Leave it” You spend more time at your job than anywhere else, so make sure it feels purposeful and fulfilling and then you will be more successful and happy. One of the most important decisions you can make that will define your happiness is your career choice.


Contribution 
Do good deeds for other people, share your gifts and expertise for the betterment of others


Connection-
Connect with others, people you love and enjoy being around. Humans are a social animal and connection is an important aspect of our well-being. The second most important decision you make that impacts your happiness is choosing who to love and who will be your mate and partner.

Spiritual-SOUL

Meditate-Meditation changes how your brain is wired and helps to reduce stress, increase awareness, lowers blood pressure and reduces anxiety and depression.

Commune with nature. Get outside, get fresh air, get outside with life and be part of nature. To do so is grounding and relieves stress.

Have Faith, Believe, Trust 
If you are religious, study, spend time with like minded people and spend time with others who challenge your beliefs. Learn what faith means to you and trust in something.

Add the key ingredient, LOVE and you have a recipe for a happy healthy life, personally, professionally, globally. That means to love yourself and others equally without judgment or fear. Love and Fear cannot coexist. It is a choice we make everyday. Ultimately, at our essence we are LOVE. We are not fear, or anger, or greed, or competition. As we continue to awaken, may we continue to grow in LOVE and exercise all that we are, in how we relate to ourselves, others and all living and non-living things on this planet. May we always focus on the solutions, rather than the problems, and truly be the change we wish to see.

loveMheyah Bailey
Marriage & Relationship Coach & Counsellor
Personal & Professional Development Coach

 

 

Contact Mheyah
cell: +44 7986 201914
email: mheyah@gmail.com

 

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I have presents for you….

ANNOUNCING THE NEW CONNECTION POINT PROMISE

At CONNECTION POINT– We promise CLARITY,
“AHA” MOMENTS & 
TRANSFORMATION.

My “soul” purpose is to support you to create authentic change 
through personal awareness, communication training & inspirational coaching.
MHEYAH BAILEY-CCO-CHIEF CONNECTION OFFICER

HAPPY SPRING EVERYONE
I have been thinking of all the amazing people in my life like you and it is a again my favourite time of year when it feels like renewal and time for new things to happen and I want to say HI.

I have been inspired to re-create CONNECTION POINT to better reflect what I do and what I offer you so please check out my website as I am so excited to share it with you so you can learn more of who I am and how I can support you. It is still in the process of evolving so please bear with me as it unfolds.
It is my “soul” purpose to help you create authentic change so you can have a life with more of what you want and less of what isn’t working. Connecting with all of you, as well as my friends and family and being of service is what makes me get up in the morning, my reason for being here on earth, the purpose of my heart and my global contribution to change the world one conversation at a time.  

I want to support you to live an Inspired Life full of more
LOVE, SUCCESS, HAPPINESS, FULFILLMENT, PURPOSE & BEAUTY. 
I can promise that spending time with me will GIVE you CLARITY, “AHA” MOMENTS & TRANSFORMATION through developing more personal awareness of your needs and values, teaching you to excel at communication and help you to create goals that will move you toward your desired future.
I am offering some STELLAR SPRING SPECIALS for everyone who wants to discover something new about themselves, wants to figure out their LIFE PURPOSE, needs help with their COMMUNICATION, is feeling CURIOUS and WONDERING what’s next, is thinking how can I change my life so I can feel HAPPIER, have less conflict and enjoy more harmonious relationships, is seriously thinking something needs to change here……………..
 
The SPRING SPECIALS are:

1. SIGN UP BELOW  for some FREE COACHING
What is the burning question you want an answer to?
CALL ME or TEXT ME at  07986 201914
or EMAIL ME at mheyah@gmail.com and we can talk about it.

2. SIGN UP BELOW if  COMMUNICATION is what you want to learn more about?and I will send you some FREE COMMUNICATION INFORMATION and regular newsletters about how to improve your communication skills.
3. SIGN UP BELOW Call, Text, Email or Join me on Twitter or Facebook and let me know what you want to change in your life and I will send you a Questionnaire to help you fine tune what you want and need.
Please share this with anyone you think would be interested in changing their life. Looking forward to connecting with you

love Mheyah

LOVE IS OUR SOUL PURPOSE”

Collaborating for Conscious Change Personally, Professionally, Globally

-Discover your Values
-Define your Purpose
-Create a Vision
-Set Goals and Support Action

At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want-Lao Tzu