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Save your Relationships-Rescue Toolkit


What is 
happening in your relationship right now?

Are you worried about where your relationship is going? Is your relationship rocky and feeling disconnected?
Arguing a lot?  Are you feeling scared there is something seriously not working? Are you worried that your relationship may not last much longer? Have you been thinking about ending the relationship yourself or are you worried that your partner is going to end the relationship sometime soon?

If so, my heart goes out to you. We’ve all been in these kinds of situations at some point in our lives and they are never easy. In fact, relationships are often our greatest source of happiness and can also be our greatest source of despair and pain.
4855659-3d-rendering-of-a-heart-with-barbed-wire-around-it

Therefore, for a limited time I’ve decided to offer a special almost Fall (my new year)  half price one-on-one “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” plus your FREE Rescue Relationship Toolkit
During this session we’ll work together to…

♥ Create a crystal clear vision for the kind of happy relationship you’d like to have.

♥ Uncover hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your relationship success.

♥  You’ll leave this session renewed, reenergized and inspired to turn your current relationship into the relationship of your dreams (or know if it’s time to get out).

couple connection

To claim your 30-minute “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” simply reply or directly book your session 778-952-4797
and answer the following questions:

1. How long have you been in this relationship?

2. On a scale of zero to 10 how important is it for you to save this relationship?

3. What are the three biggest challenges you are facing in your relationship?

Be sure to include your name, email address and phone number when you request your session so that I can get in touch with you to scheduler time together.

Love Mheyah 
PS: The sooner you send us your answers, the sooner you can start implementing the changes you want for your relationship.

MHEYAH BAILEY
HAPPINESS, SUCCESS & LOVE COACH @ CONNECTION POINT CENTRE
COMMUNICATION SPECIALIST-Teaching you the language of love, success & happiness

CLICK HERE to see my FREE Webinar on Creating Awesome Relationships

Read my syndicated article “7 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Can’t Get Turned on Anymore” on Your Tango and on Care2

About Mheyah
Mobile:778-952-4797 Find me on Skype @ Mheyah, FaceTime, WhatsApp, Facebook

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New Years Hopes, Challenges & Choices 2017

What HOPES, CHANGES and CHOICES are you going to make this year?

It is another New Year and it is customary to make resolutions and commitments and look back on the past year.
We usually ask ourselves what we want to CHANGE this year and how are we going to get there. Did you manage to achieve what you set out to do in 2016? What did you celebrate and what can you improve upon this year?

I start thinking of what I want more of in my life. What possibilities can I envision?
What do I need to change in myself, my home or in my relationships. What do I want to learn, what do I want to do and what options & choices do I have. What are you hoping for in 2017?

I am feeling inspired by possibilities and thought you might want to join me in MAKING CHANGES.
Of course the BIG questions are:
WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE OF IN YOUR LIFE? WHAT DO YOU NEED GOING FORWARD TO BE HAPPY, HAVE BETTER RELATIONSHIPS or BE MORE SUCCESSFUL AT WORK?

What is the “IT” you are wanting, dreaming or needing more of……..
and
If you had “IT” How would your life be different? and
What is stopping you from having “IT”
This is where I can help you:

define what CHANGES you want to implement
clarify what BLOCKS you need to get past
create a MAP to achieve your goal
support you in the PROCESS 

What needs a TRANSFORMATION in your life?
Your personal or professional LIFE, your HOME or your RELATIONSHIPS?

LIFE, LOVE, LIFESTYLE 
Are you living “on purpose”
Do you feel inspired everyday?
What challenges are you facing?
Do you feel what you do is meaningful?
Are your relationships full of love or full of conflict?
Do you feel fulfilled? Are you happy?
What choices do you have?
Do you feel afraid?
Do you feel in sync with who you are at your core?
I can help you discover what you want more of in your life, support you to create a life that will feel more meaningful, full of love, less stressful, healthier, happier and more successful.

I will help you clarify your goals, define how to get there with a step by step plan and coach and support you to achieve it. I will help you solve challenges, turn conflicts into opportunities and highlight new perspectives and possibilities.

DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO DISCOVER WHAT CHANGES YOU NEED TO MAKE, TO HAVE MORE OF WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE
Let me know when you want to start your new life and book your Discovery Coaching Session
BOOK HERE
Mheyah

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Save your Relationships-Rescue Toolkit


What is 
happening in your relationship right now?

Are you worried about where your relationship is going? Is your relationship rocky and feeling disconnected?
Arguing a lot?  Are you feeling scared there is something seriously not working? Are you worried that your relationship may not last much longer? Have you been thinking about ending the relationship yourself or are you worried that your partner is going to end the relationship sometime soon?

If so, my heart goes out to you. We’ve all been in these kinds of situations at some point in our lives and they are never easy. In fact, relationships are often our greatest source of happiness and can also be our greatest source of despair and pain.
4855659-3d-rendering-of-a-heart-with-barbed-wire-around-it

Therefore, for a limited time I’ve decided to offer a special almost Fall (my new year)  half price one-on-one “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” plus your FREE Rescue Relationship Toolkit
During this session we’ll work together to…

♥ Create a crystal clear vision for the kind of happy relationship you’d like to have.

♥ Uncover hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your relationship success.

♥  You’ll leave this session renewed, reenergized and inspired to turn your current relationship into the relationship of your dreams (or know if it’s time to get out).

couple connection

To claim your 30-minute “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” simply reply or directly book your session 778-952-4797
and answer the following questions:

1. How long have you been in this relationship?

2. On a scale of zero to 10 how important is it for you to save this relationship?

3. What are the three biggest challenges you are facing in your relationship?

Be sure to include your name, email address and phone number when you request your session so that I can get in touch with you to scheduler time together.

Love Mheyah 
PS: The sooner you send us your answers, the more likely you are to get a session.

MHEYAH BAILEY
HAPPINESS, SUCCESS & LOVE COACH @ CONNECTION POINT CENTRE
COMMUNICATION SPECIALIST-Teaching you the language of love, success & happiness

CLICK HERE to see my FREE Webinar on Creating Awesome Relationships

Read my syndicated article “7 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Can’t Get Turned on Anymore” on Your Tango and on Care2

About Mheyah
Mobile:778-952-4797 Find me on Skype @ Mheyah, FaceTime, WhatsApp, Facebook

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Save your Relationship Resolution 2016?


What is happening in your relationships at the start of 2016?

Are you worried about where your relationship is going? Is your relationship rocky? Arguing a lot?  Are you feeling scared there is something seriously not working? Are you worried that your relationship may not last much longer? Have you been thinking about ending the relationship yourself or are you worried that your partner is going to end the relationship sometime soon?

If so, my heart goes out to you. We’ve all been in these kinds of situations at some point in our lives and they are never easy. In fact, relationships are often our greatest source of happiness and can also be our greatest source of despair and pain.
4855659-3d-rendering-of-a-heart-with-barbed-wire-around-it

Therefore, for a limited time I’ve decided to offer a special New Years 2016 half price one-on-one “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” plus your FREE Rescue Relationship Toolkit
During this session we’ll work together to…

=> Create a crystal clear vision for the kind of happy relationship you’d like to have.

=> Uncover hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your relationship success.

=> You’ll leave this session renewed, reenergized and inspired to turn your current relationship into the relationship of your dreams (or know if it’s time to get out).

To claim your 30-minute “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” simply reply or directly book your session  and answer the following questions:

1. How long have you been in this relationship?

2. On a scale of zero to 10 how important is it for you to save this relationship?

3. What are the three biggest challenges you are facing in your relationship?

Be sure to include your name, email address and phone number when you request your session so that I can get in touch with you to schedule your session.

Love Mheyah 
PS: The sooner you send us your answers, the more likely you are to get a session.

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7 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Can’t Get Turned on Anymore


The 7 steps to flip your “turn on switch”

We all at times can wonder why we don’t have that incredible compelling desire for our partners and you start asking yourself the big questions, Why oh Why don’t they turn me on anymore? Where did our love go?

My mantra, and I am sure you may have heard me say it over and over, because it is true, “the truth is simple’ and is the same in this case.

Unless you have some hormone imbalance or another medical condition (like depression) making you not feel sexy, and you can’t find that magic sexy sweet spot,  the cause can only be one thing, a lack of mental and emotional connection.
Not only a lack of connection with each other but also with yourself. The brain is our largest sex organ and if you are not feeling sexy and connected it can only mean that you are not connecting emotionally and mentally.

Sex is the highest level of communication and if you are not communicating in all the ways that matter, sex is just not going to happen the way it used to.

So understanding the problem leads us to the solution.

If you want to feel that sexy turned on feeling again then you have to create and find the mental emotional connection.
couple connectionNow this is where my job starts. I help people create connection, more love, happiness, intimacy and passion, which leads me to one of the biggest lessons in relationships: realizing that each and everyone of us is 100% responsible for ourselves and our own happiness in the relationship.

What you can do is try to understand all the events and triggers that you may not even be aware of, that have shut OFF your “turn on switch” You also may be aware of some concerns in your relationship but you haven’t dealt with them yet. What you may not realize is that by avoiding any issues you have effectively turned OFF your “turn on switch.

There are many questions you need to honestly ask yourself and do your best to discover what is true for you, what is at the heart of the matter. When we are even the slightest bit upset with your partners, maybe aren’t even aware of feeling resentful, or we haven’t set good boundaries, aren’t aware of our own needs in the relationship, have maybe compromised on important issues where we shouldn’t have, we shut down and become disconnected. Sex is only a symptom of deeper issues that need to be resolved.

Einstien said it best when he said “a problem needs to be resolved 6 layers below where it presents itself”

So if not feeling turned on is where the issue presents itself then I can guarantee the problem is definitely deeper than that. When we are not aware of underlying upset and problems our love and “turn on switch” becomes turned OFF and we become unable to feel that passion and love we once had for our partners. It isn’t lost, it is just hidden.

What can help the situation is to ask yourself some deep and meaningful questions and answer yourself truthfully with radical honesty.

  1. Am I upset or angry with my partner in any way. Even in small ways, are you feeling upset? Is there an imbalance of responsibilities or roles? What could you be feeling hurt about? Anger is a secondary emotion that covers up more vulnerable feelings like fear, sadness, hurt to name a few.  So get real with yourself and ask yourself what are you feeling? Our feelings are our barometers that guide us to understand ourselves better.
  2. Do I feel resentful in anyway. This is a biggy. When we feel resentful and maybe not even acknowledging our resentment we automatically withdraw emotionally and sex is best when we are emotionally connected.  What could you be resenting? Your partner not helping out, not home much, not being there for you?
  3. Do I feel safe and secure in my relationship? The attachment you feel to your partner is as important as the safety and security a child needs with it’s primary caregiver so if you are feeling insecure or unsafe in any way your love switch will definitely diminish.  When I say safe and secure I am meaning, do you feel physically and emotionally safe and secure, free from fear and fully trusting your partner. Are you on the same team?
  4. What is your love language? Do you feel loved? We all have a combination of love languages and is how we feel loved. What is yours and are you getting enough of your main love language to feel special, important and loved?They are: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Affection, Acts of Service. If you can identify what makes you feel loved out of these 5, ask yourself if you are getting enough of them?
  5. Are you spending enough fun time together outside of the bedroom? FUN. Remember fun. What do you enjoy doing together? What brought you together in the first place? Whatever it is, do more of it.
  6. Are you looking after yourself? Are you making time for your own creativity, friends, exercise and living your life with purpose. We all need to feel we are living with a purpose and expressing our authentic selves. If we don’t we can project our unfulfilled selves onto our partners expecting, even unconsciously, expecting them to fulfill us and give us purpose in the world and that is not how the best relationships work. The best relationships are when two people bring their whole authentic, creative selves into the relationship and share their purpose with each other and the rest of the world.
  7. Communication. How skilled are you at communication? Are you able to express, what you feel, need and want? Do you know how to express yourself to create more connection and love, and less stress and conflict?

Couple walking

Sex is the highest form of communication so if your communications skills are lacking then so will your ability to create healthy happy relationships in all areas of your life.

Studies have proven that “85% of your happiness and success in life can be directly attributed to your communication skills” So suffice to say that communication and connection is the answer to switching ON your “turn on switch”

If you want help with your relationships or communication coaching please connect with me and BOOK YOUR SESSION BELOW

Connection Point
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Love Mheyah 

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Blogs

Get your FREE Relationship Rescue Toolkit now
Use these tools to Create Happier Relationships immediately

Mheyah BaileyI will send you 3 Complimentary Gifts:
* The 3 Simple Principles to Stop Conflict Guide
* The 10 Awesome Reasons why Improving your Communication will Change your Life
* Plus VIP access to the launch of
"5 Simple Steps to Create Successful Relationships" online course


Thank you for joining CONNECTION POINT CENTRE-A place to learn how to improve your relationships, positively connect with others, create more love, happiness & success and change the world one conversation at a time.

Your email address will never be sold or shared with any 3rd parties and you will receive only the type of content for which you signed up.

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Successful Communication Made Simple

Successful Communication Made SimpleSuccessful Communication Made Simple

This is the best course to get you on the right path for more LOVE, SUCCESS & HAPPINESS in all areas of your life.

85% of your happiness and success in life can be determined by your communication skills.

This 7 module course highlights the 5 important principles needed to create successful relationships personally and professionally. It is a simple, easy to use, but rich in-depth course that teaches the important qualities you need to create more connection with those you love, help you manage conflict and differences and integrates them with the 5 simple Step by Step System for win-win conversations so you can get on the path to more Love, Happiness and Success.

Have Questions?

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*Phone Number

*Email Address

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With This Course You Will Gain:

♥ More loving & harmonious relationships

♥ Become more successful professionally

♥ You will feel happier & more content

♥ Have more confidence in your abilities

♥ Enjoy more understanding, love & appreciation

♥ Create a respectful passionate connection & deep friendship with your partner

"Mheyah is an absolute rockstar! I don't have words to express how pleased I am with how the evening unfolded.  You are completely in your sacred gifts, doing this work and it was so much fun. Thank you from my heart for stepping in and making such a powerful difference.  You're amazing!"
-Christine Awram of WOW-Women of Worth, Winner of the 2012 Outstanding
Leadership Award and nominated for the Governor General’s Award

Sign Up

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Stop in the name of Love


Quick Tip on how to stop conflict 

STOP. Just stop.
stopIt takes two people to argue and create conflict so if you want your relationship to feel better, be more connected and loving if it is a personal relationship or a more collaborative and respectful working relationship, then one of you has to change the dynamic. It doesn’t matter who takes responsibility first but it only takes one person to shift the relationship in a positive direction.
You can do this. Once you are committed to a no arguing rule then you can look at what you are really wanting to argue about. We fight because we need something or a principle or value has been compromised. Once you are clear about what you are fighting for then you can express what you need in a positive way.

Quick view of a positive win win conversation:

1. Intention: What is important to you about the conversation?
2. Issue: Say what happened without blame
3. Feel: Share how are you feeling
4. Need: Say what your needs, values, principles or beliefs are.
5. Ask: Tell the other person how they can help the situation and ask if they are able and willing to help
I can guarantee you have the power to make positive shifts in all your relationships
To learn more Relationship Rescue Strategies click here or To claim your 30-minute “Relationship Rescue Coaching Session” simply reply or directly book your FREE session


Love Mheyah 

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Let’s talk about SEX


How many times a week do you think couples should be having sex?

Well the real answer is, as many times as suits the couple. Everyone is different and as long as both partners are happy with the frequency then all is good.

Here is the thing. Sex is the highest form of communication and all that ‘conversation stuff’ is all foreplay. So let’s talk about how communication, conversations and connection ties in with having great sex.

The truth is, sex is all about communication and is our most intimate form of communicating with our partners.
"love and heart"How we connect with others comes naturally to some and not so naturally to others but is essential for building awesome relationships. We communicate and transmit information all day long; I am available or not, I am open or not, I am relaxed or not, I like you or not, I love you or not. I want to have sex or not. The absence of good communication between couples can cause many problems, pain, misunderstandings, conflict, disconnection, lack of harmony and love, and yes when this happens can mean less sex too. This is how we end up in the proverbial catch-22 of disconnection. We feel upset with our partners or they are upset with us and we disconnect emotionally and then disengage physically and we end up in the relationship spiral of doom. We need physical intimacy to feel happy and connected emotionally and we need emotional connection to have great physical intimacy.

A lot of couples don’t want to have sexual contact when they are upset and feel emotional disconnected so they go round and round getting more emotionally and physically distant and the great relationship divide has happened. It can be so discouraging and disheartening.
4855659-3d-rendering-of-a-heart-with-barbed-wire-around-itI would like to suggest that our relationships don’t need to go through this painful process. We communicate with our actions, what we say or don’t say, and we can certainly learn to communicate more effectively to increase positive connection with our partners. Love after all is an action word.

To have more love, quality connection, passion and intimacy in your life you must be more loving and this is where being able to communicate in more loving ways will elevate your relationship to levels of AWESOME-ness.
No relationship can be truly happy, fulfilling & successful without knowing how to express yourself to the important people in your life. We all want to feel valued, loved, respected, to feel special and important and I can guarantee you learning new ways to communicate will bring you more of what you want.

Relationships need safety and healthy attachment to thrive. The one question we all need to know from our partners is, “are you there for me” and when we trust that someone is there for us it builds an awesome level of intimacy and connection and yes this is the space for great sex.

If you relationship is not thriving in the way you would like and you don’t understand why not, ask yourself what you could do to improve connection with your love.
"love held in our hands"

Here is a list of ideas to get you started with reconnecting. Think of the whole day as foreplay. Love is in the Details.
I am sure you can come up with a few of your own as well.

  1. positively engage, listen, be curious
  2. be calm and non-reactive, explain what you need and want clearly
  3. be appreciative and grateful for what your partner brings to the relationship, thank them for the things they do 
  4. share common interests, time together
  5. laugh with each other
  6. be openly affectionate, look at her/him directly
  7. be transparent and trustworthy
  8. do not criticize, blame or judge
  9. put your phone away
  10. check in for 20 minutes everyday
  11. smile at each other
  12. text little things during the day ????
  13. gifts for no special reason are nice????
  14. look after yourself which means you take care of yourself, body, mind and soul
  15. grow, learn, create, be inspired
  16. be happy
  17. kiss????
  18. celebrate
  19. offer to help, support, be of value
  20. be loving, caring, kind, compassionate

As Rumi says; Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

Need relationship help-you can book me directly

loveLove Mheyah 
Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
instagram@mheyahbailey
pinterest@mheyahbailey

Find out more about Mheyah

 

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How to deal with other people’s Big Feelings

 

6 Ways to deal with other people’s “Big Feelings” by Mheyah Bailey

I ran out of compassion, curiousity and courage the other day. All the important relationship principles were here in my heart and head, and then in a flash they were gone and I mean gone.
I am again reminded of how hard it is to stay grounded when someone else is yelling, upset and angry. I think I should qualify that. Anyone can yell and it doesn’t affect me, however if someone I love and care about yells and is upset, that is a completely different story.

I have a tendency to fall into complete trauma when anyone yells at me and appears to be angry with me. I interpret angry loud communication, which in our family we call Big Feelings, as very threatening to the relationship, could possible mean the relationship is over, I have been bad in some way and I am not loved. It hits me in my most vulnerable place of fear of losing love, not being good enough or not being loveable.
That is my old story and sometimes my history really jumps up and bites me, as my brain seems to have a mind of it’s own and just goes off into this weird place of threat and fear. I felt blindsided by my vulnerable self and couldn’t hang onto my adult, mature self. Counselors are human after all.
kid-tantrum-stubborn-brat

Well the truth is that our brains actually do that. If anyone has been the recipient of trauma or abuse then the trauma is most likely hardwired into the brain. That is essentially what PTSD is and sometimes when I am surprised by what I perceive as an attack I melt down just like I would have as a child in the face of abandonment and rejection.
I know in my logical brain that isn’t true but in the heat of the moment I have to talk my way into a calmer more rational place. So how does one self soothe during relationship conflict, stress, trauma or drama? I believe it is much the same for a lot of people and is how arguments start because both parties feel they must defend themselves from attack. The trick is to self soothe so you don’t fall into defensiveness and attack back.

It is particularly damaging to live with negative emotions such as contempt, judgment and anger and is up to both parties to learn to be responsible for their reactions and responses.

This article however is for you, while dealing with an upset person. 

Here are 6 actions you can do to help yourself when someone else is really upset.

  1. Cry and run away. Just kidding, that was my 6 year old talking
  1. Set a Boundary and take a time out- hold up the hand and say I need time out and I will talk to you when you stop raising your voice and I feel calm.
    No one deserves to be yelled at and you don’t need to take responsibility for someone else’s feelings. It is their responsibility to learn to share their feelings in a positive and healthy way. Your part is to set a boundary about what kind of treatment you will accept. The person with the Big Feelings is most likely not able to soothe themselves yet, so it is up to you to create the space for everyone to return to calm. It doesn’t mean the issue has gone away, it just means both parties can return to the conversation and find resolution. A time out is essential so that you have the time to self soothe, calm down, become conscious of your own feelings, needs and values and return to a place of commitment, curiousity, compassion and courage. Remind yourself ‘I am not responsible for anyone else’s feelings’
    boundaries-1
  2. Don’t take it personally As you are taking your time out remember and repeat ‘this isn’t about me’ ‘this isn’t about me’  ‘this isn’t about me’
    Someone who is upset, angry and expressing themselves loudly is most likely feeling hurt, in pain and feeling threatened in some way themselves, so it is vital to not make up any stories about what it all means and remember that it says more about them than it does about you and repeat ‘I am not responsible for anyone else’s feelings’

    nothing anyone says or does means anything about you

  3. Breathe deeply, concentrate on breathing from your stomach and as the old saying goes count to 10 or maybe even 100. We forget to breath and when we are faced with conflict, stress or trauma we start to breath very shallow which deprives the brain and organs of much need oxygen. If you notice you are breathing in your upper chest, stand against a wall and breath through your lower abdomen. It will increase oxygen and automatically relieve stress and repeat ‘I am not responsible for someone else’s feelings’Keep Calm
  4. See a counselor or coach to work through your brain wiring, communication skills, boundary setting and other roadblocks to contentment and successful relationships.
    Some counselors and coaches including myself offer crisis management if you need to connect with someone for support either through email or phone calls. I have found it can be very beneficial to support my clients through conflict in the moment rather than wait until the event is over. It can help uncover those hidden core tapes that are usually the cause of our reactions.
    There are many techniques to achieve calm in the face of stress through meditation, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitizing Reprocessing) hypnosis, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) just to name a few and repeat ‘ I am not responsible for some else’s feelings’DSC_2976
  5. Meditate for 10 to 30 minutes. There are many options out there for meditating and is probably the most valuable tool for soothing oneself and changing the state of your brain from stress to calm. There are abundant resources for guided meditations or meditating on your own. Either way meditating is the best solution for taking a step back, self soothe and reminding yourself ‘you are not responsible for anyone else’s feelings’
    TimeOut
  6. Remind yourself what you are responsible for. You are only responsible to stay responsibly connected. What does that mean? Well I can tell you what it doesn’t mean first. It doesn’t mean, that you accept abuse, disrespect, contempt, judgment, accusations, blame, criticism, name calling etc.
    What it does mean is that you recognize and can discern that someone is just upset and lost their ‘stuff’ You know that you trust them and yourself to remain in the relationship until it is resolved, that you are responsible for your own reactions, responses and feelings and have learned communication skills that creates connection rather than disconnection and that you really, really get, that your are not responsible for some else’s feelings but you are responsible for responding with awareness of yourself, compassion, curiousity, love, courage and are committed to collaborating to resolve the issue.
    Screen Shot 2015-02-27 at 9.04.29 AM

 

loveLove Mheyah 
Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

facebook@connectionpointcentre
twitter@mheyahbailey
instagram@mheyahbailey
pinterest@mheyahbailey

Find out more about Mheyah