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HAPPY-NESS is an Inside Job

And Now for Something Completely Different
Also published on MetroLivingZine

We are taking a break this week from our Creating Successful Relationships series Instead I have written a lifestyle list for HAPPY-NESS because relationships are really inside work and you are responsible for your health and happiness, no one else.

It can be a challenging concept to understand that relationships are inside work and I don’t mean just our love relationships, but all relationships. It is our own responsibility to make ourselves happy, follow our own paths to passion, creativity and fulfillment and not blame others for our unhappiness. All our connections teach us about ourselves and need us to grow into our best selves to flourish, so for a change lets look at ourselves, and what we can do to make ourselves happier.

Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony – Thomas Merton.

Happiness and living an inspired and conscious life can only be achieved if there is balance between the physical BODY, spiritual SOUL and emotional MIND.

BE committed, DO what it takes, to HAVE what you want-Choices International

RECIPE for a HAPPY LIFE

Happiness Recipe

Physical-BODY

Get plenty of exercise, movement and fresh air. Men need a minimum of 3 times a week and women need up to 5 times a week of regular exercise. New studies have said we are healthier if we get 450 minutes a week of exercise which equate to roughly and hour a day. That is where walking a dog could help J
The benefits of exercise are widely known including physical and mental health on many levels. Our bodies are meant to move and express themselves. Movement keeps our hearts healthy, our weight in balance, our bones strong and creates endorphins for happiness, so if you want to feel better all the way around then start moving, whatever way feels inspiring to you.  If you can’t manage to stay committed and need help, hire a coach, a trainer, get an exercise buddy or figure out what is stopping you. Exercise decreases depression, improves sleep, reduces stress and elevates self-esteem while building strong bodies, bones and strengthens immunity. So get out and Swim, Ski, Run, Yoga, Pilates, Dance, Cycle, Run, Walk, Hike………Doesn’t matter what it is “just do it” as the saying goes. Thank you Nike.

Eat healthier. Buy quality whole foods, cook responsibly for heart health and nourishment and then balance your caloric intake with your exercise. Don’t eat junk or processed food. Eat at regular intervals to maintain a healthy glycemic index and eat 3 -4 small meals a day over eating one large one only at night and don’t eat late at night. You are what you eat, or so the saying goes.

Drink water
-5-8 glasses a day depending on your weight. Being dehydrated creates stress on the body so that your body does not run efficiently, builds up toxins, compromises digestion and creates fatigue.


Get sufficient rest
. We are a sleep-deprived culture. About eight hours of sleep is the minimum for the body to repair itself. You may personally need more or less, as sleep requirements vary between people but we do need adequate sleep to achieve our fullest potential. Don’t drink caffeine before bed, eat heavy foods or engage in mentally stimulating activity. Let your brain calm down and keep the lighting low for an hour before sleep and sweet dreams.


Find time to relax
. Just lie down, think positive thoughts, meditate or take up a relaxing hobby, socialize with people you love.


Do something creative.  
Pick a hobby or recreation that you enjoy as it will balance out daily stress. This is one of the most important aspects to happiness in my mind and is also one of the most important aspects for healthy relationships. It is vitally important to continue or find your creative centre for your relationships to thrive. When each person in any couple feels fulfilled creatively it will keep your relationship sparkling with enthusiasm and inspiration too.

Live somewhere that you love to come home to.
Create your SPECIAL SPACES
Surround yourself with beauty. 
At least what you consider to be beautiful

Emotional-MIND

Plan out your day and set goals. Remain flexible and try different approaches to your goals. Remember, sometimes life goes differently than you planned and you may not have time for everything. Just be productive in the time you have and do your best to not stress if you don’t accomplish everything just the way you planned. Perspective and positivity is important to ones well-being and sense of self-esteem. Formula for goal setting
S.M.A.R.T. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Timely

Find and develop your gifts and talents
. Go out and try activities to find what you are good at and what you love and feel passionate about. We are all good at something


Keep a diary or a journal.
 This would be a good place to write things out, talk about your thoughts and feelings. Process life as it happens. It will give you a memoir to share when you are older.


Read
. Try classics such as Shakespeare, Jane Austen, Montaigne, Proust, or Tolstoy. If you are not fond of those, try the newspaper, a fantasy novel, history, personal growth, bibliography, or mystery. There’s something for everyone- check out your local library or a bookstore. I love bookstores. So many books, so little time.


Think responsibly-
You are what you think, whether you believe you can or you can’t, it is the truth. See more about THINKING

Learn something new every day-
Whenever we learn something new, including new attitudes, perspectives, or behaviors, we are changing the physical structure of the brain.


Education. 
Be independent and self-supporting. Educate yourself, master the skills necessary for your advancement and ability to contribute. You will not be dependent upon anyone else and safety and security is a fundamental human need.


Appreciation makes you Happy.
 Money is not that important. Fulfillment and Purpose are the most important qualities to create happiness Remember rich people are no happier than average people. After ones basic needs are met people that have more money are not any happier than those without a lot of money.

Play, Laugh & then Laugh and Play some more
You can learn more about a man in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. It is essential to ones soul and physical well-being to laugh, play and be a kid again. Never lose your inner child.

"joy and happiness"
Communicate effectively-see all about communication and the importance of effective communication on your happinessCommunication 

Listen 
to others. There is difference between just hearing the words and actually paying attention, listening and understanding them.

Compassion is an essential ingredient to connecting with others and living a heart centered life.

Process-
Be with yourself and learn what your feelings are telling you. Let them inform you of the deeper meanings.  Before you react in anger understand that anger is only a secondary emotion and that the feelings underneath that inform us of needs and values that are being compromised. If we do not look within, we will go without. The wholeness of ourselves does not depend on our personalities but depends entirely on the awareness of our inner feelings.


Consciousness-“Don’t believe everything you think”
 but do know that to live consciously means using the wisdom of the heart and the power of the mind. Seek out like minded individuals, go to counselling, get a coach, have a growth buddy, support group, join groups, learn. It is our human journey to grow, heal and change.


Responsibility-
be “respons-able” means be responsible for how you behave, how you react, are you choosing fear or love, are you bullying anyone or not asking for what you need and want, where are you not showing up, giving up, acting angry, hiding in confusion, not looking after yourself, abusing………,

Authenticity-Means to be genuine and honest about who you are in this world. It is way less stressful to be oneself at all times. “If you aren’t going to be you, who is?” Sometimes to be ourselves requires courage as we may face judgment or criticism but to live an authentic life is surely something to strive for as it is the foundation for purpose, happiness, love, fulfillment and success.

Purpose– Your purpose is who you were born to be and how you live every dayFind your purpose and everything else will fall into place. See Purpose…..

Career-
To be happy, ones job has to be one you love. “Love it or Leave it” You spend more time at your job than anywhere else, so make sure it feels purposeful and fulfilling and then you will be more successful and happy. One of the most important decisions you can make that will define your happiness is your career choice.


Contribution 
Do good deeds for other people, share your gifts and expertise for the betterment of others


Connection-
Connect with others, people you love and enjoy being around. Humans are a social animal and connection is an important aspect of our well-being. The second most important decision you make that impacts your happiness is choosing who to love and who will be your mate and partner.

Spiritual-SOUL

Meditate-Meditation changes how your brain is wired and helps to reduce stress, increase awareness, lowers blood pressure and reduces anxiety and depression.

Commune with nature. Get outside, get fresh air, get outside with life and be part of nature. To do so is grounding and relieves stress.

Have Faith, Believe, Trust 
If you are religious, study, spend time with like minded people and spend time with others who challenge your beliefs. Learn what faith means to you and trust in something.

Add the key ingredient, LOVE and you have a recipe for a happy healthy life, personally, professionally, globally. That means to love yourself and others equally without judgment or fear. Love and Fear cannot coexist. It is a choice we make everyday. Ultimately, at our essence we are LOVE. We are not fear, or anger, or greed, or competition. As we continue to awaken, may we continue to grow in LOVE and exercise all that we are, in how we relate to ourselves, others and all living and non-living things on this planet. May we always focus on the solutions, rather than the problems, and truly be the change we wish to see.

loveMheyah Bailey
Marriage & Relationship Coach & Counsellor
Personal & Professional Development Coach

 

 

Contact Mheyah
cell: +44 7986 201914
email: mheyah@gmail.com

 

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CONNECTION POINT CENTRE

Happy_2042210cWe Help You Create Successful Conversations & Connections In All Areas Of Your Life So You Will:

  • Manage Conflict & Differences positively
  • Have More Loving & Harmonious Relationships 
  • Save your Marriage
  • Be More Successful Professionally
  • Feel Confident and have Fun Dating
  • Feel Happier & More Content
  • Have More Confidence In Your Abilities
  • Enjoy More Understanding, Love & Appreciation
  • Have A Respectful Passionate Connection & Deep Friendship With Your Partner

Get your FREE Successful Conversation & Connection webinar & our weekly tips here 

Thank you for visiting Connection Point Centre for Communication. We are here to help you find the keys to more happiness, success, love and fulfillment in your life. Connecting with a coach can help you discover “yourself” so you can get past the obstacles that are holding you back from having the life you want. I will support you to make the necessary changes for you to be successful in all areas of your life, whether you want to feel happier and more at peace, have more loving relationships with less conflict or find your true hearts calling and purpose.
Change can be so much easier with a coach and I am committed to support, inspire encourage and collaborate with you to create the life you want. 

With my support you will create new empowering beliefs & behavior patterns that inspire confidence and move you toward your goals, learn how to communicate effectively everywhere in your life so you feel confident and self assured in positive outcomes. Create a vision for your life and turn it into a reality
. Eliminate self-destructive habits that are keeping you stuck. I look forward to connecting with you, Mheyah 
Call now to book your FREE online connection session +1-778-952-4797

“I was a participant in one of Mheyah’s Group Facilitations and she was brilliant. She easily and expertly led us to individual awareness, gave us practical context for improving our communication with others, and challenged us to use our new knowledge in a fun and enlightening exercise. Mheyah is a skilled facilitator committed to high impact outcomes and I am very happy to recommend her work to groups of all types.”

MS-Award Winning Business Differentiation Coach
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New Years Changes, Challenges & Choices

What CHANGES and CHOICES are you going to make this year?

It is another New Year and it is customary to make resolutions and commitments.
We ask ourselves what we want to CHANGE this year and how are we going to get there. I start thinking of what I want more of in my life. What do I need to change in myself, my home or in my relationships. What do I want to learn, what do I want to do and what options & choices do I have.
I am feeling inspired and thought you might want to join me in MAKING CHANGES.
Of course the BIG questions are:
WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE OF IN YOUR LIFE?
Is “IT” more love, happiness, joy, purpose, colour, style, peace, organization, furniture, knowledge, money, friends, learning, inspiration?
What is the “IT” you are wanting, dreaming or needing more of……..
and
If you had “IT” How would your life be different? and
What is stopping you from having “IT”
This is where I can help you:
define what CHANGES you want to implement
clarify what BLOCKS you need to get past
create a MAP to achieve your goal
support you in the PROCESS 

What needs a TRANSFORMATION in your life?
Your personal or professional LIFE, your HOME or your RELATIONSHIP?

LIFE, LOVE & LIFESTYLE 
Are you living “on purpose”
Do you feel inspired everyday?
What challenges are you facing?
Do you feel what you do is meaningful?
Are your relationships full of love or full of conflict?
Do you feel fulfilled? Are you happy?
What choices do you have?
Do you feel afraid?
Do you feel in sync with who you are at your core?
I can help you discover what you want more of in your life, support you to create a life that will feel more meaningful, full of love, less stressful, healthier, happier and more successful.

I will help you clarify your goals, define how to get there with a step by step plan and coach and support you to achieve it. I will help you solve challenges, turn conflicts into opportunities and highlight new perspectives and possibilities.

HOME, DECOR & SPECIAL SPACES
Your home is more than just four walls. We all have dreams of what kind of life we will live in our homes, whether we dream of a safe harbour from the rest of the world, a place to live and connect with those we love, raise children and grandchildren, share memories for a lifetime with family and friends, a place to express ones individuality in decor, furniture and art.
It is about fulfilling a dream and I guarantee to help that dream unfold so your home is a complete reflection of who you are, what inspires you, what is relaxing, what ambiance makes you smile. I will support & coach you to fulfill that dream so your home is a place you love to come home to.
I will give you a “to-do” list, access to suppliers, placement advice, colour ideas, renovation consulting and so much more.

As your Lifestyle Coach & Creative Consultant I will create a clear plan of how to style your home so you have the life of your dreams in your special space.
Click here Special Spaces Inside & Out

DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO DISCOVER WHAT CHANGES YOU NEED TO MAKE, TO HAVE MORE OF WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE

I am looking forward to connecting with you, Mheyah

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COMMUNICATION 101-THE 3 SIMPLE PRINCIPLES


CONSCIOUSNESS + CURIOUSITY + COMPASSION 

“THE QUALITY OF OUR RELATIONSHIPS DETERMINES THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES”

People tend to say “communication is key” or “you have to communicate to have a good relationship” but honestly, what is good communication?
How is it going to help you create a more loving, peaceful, passionate relationship with your partner, better relationships with your coworkers, friends and family?

I have discovered 3 SIMPLE PRINCPLES that when used will change all your relationships to CONFLICT FREE RELATIONSHIPS.
It is not about eliminating conflict but learning how to manage your way through conflict effectively and positively minimizing damage to your relationships. The 3 C’s are an equation of Control (Consciousness) + Curiousity (Care) + Compassion (Consideration)

1. CONSCIOUSNESS (CONTROL):
So what does being CONSCIOUS mean? 

CONSCIOUSNESS: (kon-shuhs-nis) NOUN: to understand the deeper meaning of what you think and feel
It is about really noticing and becoming aware of your own feelings, reactions and responses. Relationships are inside work and the people around us are only triggers for us to notice how we are feeling, what has made us feel that way, what values are being prodded, what needs are being compromised, what story are we telling ourselves about an event, comment or conversation.

Our reactions and feelings are entirely made up from what we think and the perspective we have told ourselves about it. I do love to say “don’t believe everything you think” and the reason is that what we think is shaped by our past experiences good and bad. If we don’t have a thought then we won’t have a feeling or reaction, and that feeling is most likely based on thoughts that are probably not unbiased thoughts, but a collection of conclusions we learned since childhood and through past hurts where we have learned to deny our needs, values and primary emotions.
For instance one person can hear a comment or view an event completely differently than you, based on your different experiences with the words, what happened, where they were said, how they were said, the context etc and both of you could easily draw up completely different conclusions, neither right or wrong, just different.
Your job is to notice what story, or tape you have running in the background that filters all the messages you get from others. Once you notice your thoughts and the FEELINGS that come up from the interaction you can get clearer on what those FEELINGS mean to you. I know I am using the “F” word but seriously our FEELINGS are our barometer for what we really need and value and when we are able to tune into them we have done the first part to learning how to communicate better with the purpose of living more authentically & truthfully with ourselves and others. The impact of being able to do this is you will be able to live your life more in line with your real needs and values not from the unconscious drivers from the past.

The intention of the consciousness exercise is to then be able to express how you feel to another person in a calm and clear way, which in turn builds connection, trust and a greater understanding between you BUT  for now I would like to invite you to NOTICE what you FEEL when something or someone is “triggering” you and what thoughts or story came up before you had a reaction. Work backwords. Do your best to just be aware of yourself and we will talk about how to share it with others later on in the series.

To learn more about emotions and feelings here is an excellent article to help you CLICK HERE

2. CURIOUSITY (CARE)
So what does it mean to be CURIOUS?

CURIOUS:[kyoor-ee-uhs] ADJECTIVE: eager to learn, understand or know; to be inquisitive, arousing or exciting speculation, interest, or attention through being different or unknown; an inquiring open mind interested & seeking to know and understand; to wonder.

Be curious with the open heart & mind of a child. Have you ever listened to a child who is curious about something? They are unequalled in their persistence to get the answers so they can understand.

I believe it is invaluable to be deeply interested in what another person is trying to express with no agenda other than to understand, and in turn being deeply curious about yourself, what you are feeling and what you need to express as well.
Being curious shows that you care, that you are interested, that how the other person feels is important to you and that they are important to you. While being curious you need to be able to listen without judgment or interrupting. Listening means to be silent and that your brain is entirely engaged with your partners experience and how they are feeling as they struggle to express what is going on for them, while also being mindful of your own feelings and responses. It is helpful to stop yourself from knowing anything and to not  be in rebuttal mode. It means that you remain an open blank slate without making assumptions that you already know and understand what others are trying to express.

Curiousity means that you are remembering that none of what is being said is personal and it means you are LISTENING INTENTLY to what is being said, what is happening, what has caused the upset, what the other persons values are, what is important to them and how they want or need something to be different so they will be happier and your relationship will be better personally or professionally.
A need could be as simple as desiring more tidiness or as fundamental as wanting to feel more respected, but all worthy of our time, compassion, cooperation and collaboration to resolve.

GREAT LITTLE VIDEO FOR YOU “Remember it is NOT about the NAIL

It is so important to check out what is going on for another person, make sure what you heard is what was intended, and do your best to understand what is important, what they need and are asking for.  Curiousity builds trust if you are truly seeking to understand someone else with a compassionate heart.

POWER OF LOVEIf you can stay curious even in times of relationship stress, you are on the road to positive healthy relationships. Curiousity helps you stay present to what is happening, what is trying to happen and collaboratively decide what needs to happen going forward. Being curious about the people we are in relationships with, how they experience life, understanding and appreciating their perspective is the key to love in personal relationships and collaborative professional relationships creating an unbreakable bond of positive connection and mutual respect.

 Questions can often times sound judgemental or like a criticism so it can be helpful to not use the word “why” but instead to use open questions that start with “what” and “how”:

What happened?
What is that like?
How do you feel?
What is important about that to you?
What do you need?
Can you help me understand?
How can I help?
 

3. COMPASSION (CONSIDERATION)

So what is COMPASSION?
COMPASSION: (kuhm-pash-uhn) NOUN: a feeling of deep empathy, care and understanding for another who is upset, hurting, in pain or stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to care for and alleviate the suffering. It means to have heart.

We all need to learn to have an endless well of compassion if we are to improve our connections with others, which in a lot of cases means we need to suspend judgement, our own self talk and reactivity. Empathy and compassion are the underlying premise of all positive connections and conversations and is the cord between hearts. Compassion is different than sympathy and is simply the ability to remain in an open loving heart and be with someone else’s pain even when it is sometimes directed at you. This can sometimes be difficult to actually achieve, however it is vitally important to any relationship.
For any successful healthy relationship both parties need to feel heard, understood, appreciated and accepted, however resolution when there are differences or conflict is a process that sometimes cannot happen immediately, but happens over some time, hours, days or weeks. We sometimes have to be patient with the process. When someone is experiencing upset they may not have the capacity for compassion in that moment and that is why it is so important for any of us to have an endless well of compassion for the person who is experiencing some strong feelings, whatever the cause, even if you are the cause. In our family we call our upsets “big feelings” and we all know when there are some “big feelings” happening that it is our time to bring on the compassion, attentive listening and care for the person having the ‘big feelings”
To have compassion and remain compassionate can be difficult sometimes if those “big feelings” are directed at you, however this is where it is vital not to take anything personally, stay calm and remember that any upset is more about the other person than it is about you. I am also not advocating that you stay in any abusive situation but I am saying that compassion is the antidote to upset, pain, hurt and conflict.
"love and heart connection"

 

It is a natural human response to feel defensive or on guard when someone’s pain, hurt, upset or a complaint is directed at us, however this is where the rubber meets the road so to speak in any conflictual interaction, and where we all must learn NOT to take someone else’s pain on, don’t take anything personally no matter what, and to remain in our compassionate heart, because that compassion is the glue in the relationship, whether it is a personal or professional relationship.
I often used to say to my husband when I was upset that the only action required was for him to have compassion for me in those difficult moments. Nothing else, just compassion. Trust is built on compassion because it makes others feel important and valuable and that you care about their well being.
Another point that is important to remember about being compassionate is it allows the other person to take responsibility for their own feelings and work through to the deeper issues. It allows all of us the opportunity to let others be responsible for themselves, not try to fix them or the situation, or be codependent ourselves. The beauty in this is it allows for you to be an integral part of someone else’s personal growth. What you are creating in that moment is a strong connection, an intimate bond in our common humanity to heal and grown in our aspiration for acceptance and love.
You will also need to learn to reflect back what is being expressed and how it makes sense to you knowing the other person (more on that in later issues) Compassionate Reflection is the action required after someone has shared with you, so the other person knows you have heard and understood what they have communicated. It is a simple summary of what you believe you heard the other person saying which gives them the opportunity to agree or adjust the message or to continue in more depth.
I believe that the pursuit of love, appreciation and acknowledgement is probably one of our most fundamental human needs and motivators. I can’t say enough about COMPASSION as it is my belief that it is the foundation for all positive human interactions and what really connects us all heart to heart.
So I would like to invite you this week to notice opportunities to engage in some Compassionate Listening & Reflecting and to remember to give yourself some compassion, love and caring too. Let me know how you did. I would love to hear your experience.
Listen HERE to The Buddhist Monk, Thich Nhat Hanh on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday short sharing on Compassionate Listening

So now you have the 3 SIMPLE PRINCIPLES THAT IF YOU IMPLEMENT THEM WILL POSITIVELY CHANGE ALL YOUR RELATIONSHIPS PERSONALLY & PROFESSIONALLY

SIGN UP BELOW TO KEEP LEARNING AND GET VALUABLE INSIGHTS-SEE THE NEXT 2 PRINCIPLES
“THE WHOLENESS OF OURSELVES DOES NOT DEPEND ON OUR PERSONALITIES BUT DEPENDS ENTIRELY ON THE AWARENESS OF OUR INNER FEELINGS”

Recommended reading is:
My Communication Series on my blog
The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman
Getting the Love you Want by Harville Hendrix
The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work by Dr. John Gottman

Love Mheyah ♥
Please connect with me. Book your session below

Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@gmail.com

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CHANGES, CHALLENGES & CHOICES


CHANGES from the “INSIDE OUT”
It is that time of year again when for me it is my New Year. School goes back in, lazy summer days turn to crisp fragrant fall days and my mind turns to CHANGE,and I start thinking of what I want more of in my life. What do I need to change in myself, my home or in my relationships? What do I want to learn, what do I want to do and what options & choices do I have? 

I am always inspired to do something new in September, and thought you might want to join me in MAKING CHANGES.

Of course the BIG question is:
WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE OF IN YOUR LIFE?
Is “IT”  more love, happiness, joy, purpose, colour, style, peace, organization, furniture, knowledge, money, friends, learning, inspiration? 
What is the “IT” you are wanting, dreaming or needing more of……..
and…….
IF YOU HAD “IT” HOW WOULD YOUR LIFE BE DIFFERENT?
and…….
WHAT IS STOPPING YOU FROM ACHIEVING “IT”
THIS IS WHERE I CAN HELP YOU
I am offering a FREE 30 minute coaching session so together we can:

  • Define what CHANGES you want to make
  • Clarify what BLOCKS you are facing
  • Create a MAP to achieve your goal

What needs a TRANSFORMATION?  Your personal or professional LIFE, your HOME or your RELATIONSHIP

LIFE, LOVE & LIFESTYLE
Are you living “on purpose” 
Do you feel inspired everyday?
What challenges are you facing?
Do you feel what you do is meaningful?
Are your relationships full of love or full of conflict?
Do you feel fulfilled? Are you happy?
What choices do you have?
Do you feel afraid?
Do you feel in sync with who you are at your core?

I can help you discover what you want more of in your life, support you to create a life that will feel more meaningful, full of love, less stressful, healthier, happier and more successful. 
I will help you clarify your goal, define how to get there with a step by step plan and coach and support you to achieve it. I will help you solve challenges, turn conflicts into opportunities and highlight new perspectives and possibilities.
Go to my website to learn more about how coaching can help you change your life. 


HOME, DECOR & SPECIAL SPACES

Your home is more than just four walls. We all have dreams of what kind of life we will live in our homes, whether we dream of a safe harbour from the rest of the world, a place to live and connect with those we love, raise children and grandchildren, share memories for a lifetime with family and friends, a place to express ones individuality in decor, furniture and art. 

It is about fulfilling a dream and I guarantee to help that dream unfold so your home is a complete reflection of who you are, what inspires you, what is relaxing, what ambiance makes you smile. I will support & coach you to fulfill that dream so your home is a place you love to come home to.
I will give you a “to-do” list, access to suppliers, placement advice, colour ideas, renovation consulting and so much more. As your Lifestyle Coach I will create a clear plan of how to style your home so you have the life of your dreams in your special space.Click here Special Spaces Inside & Out


DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO DISCOVER WHAT CHANGES YOU NEED TO MAKE, TO HAVE MORE OF WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE

Call, text or email me to set up time for your free 30 minute coaching session  
I am looking forward to connecting with you 

Mheyah
778-881-0410

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Be Benevolent by Rick Hanson

What are your intentions toward others?
The Practice

Be benevolent.

Why?
Benevolence is a fancy word that means something simple: good intentions toward living beings, including oneself.

This goodwill is present in warmth, friendliness, compassion, ordinary decency, fair play, kindness, altruism, generosity, and love. The benevolent heart leans toward others; it is not neutral or indifferent. Benevolence is the opposite of ill will, coldness, prejudice, cruelty, and aggression. We’ve all been benevolent, we all know what it’s like to wish someone well.

Benevolence is widely praised – from parents telling children to share their toys to saints preaching the Golden Rule – because it has so many benefits:

* Benevolence toward oneself is needed to fulfill our three fundamental needs: to avoid harms, approach rewards, and attach to others. When these needs are met, your brain shifts into its Responsive mode, in which the body repairs and refuels itself, you feel peaceful, happy, and loving.

* Benevolence toward others reduces quarrels, builds trust, and is the best-odds strategy to get good treatment in return.

* Benevolence within and between nations promotes the rule of law, educates children, feeds the hungry, supports human rights, offers humanitarian aid, and works for peace. Benevolence toward our planet tries to protect endangered species and reduce global warming.

Of course, this is just a partial list of benefits. Bottom-line, benevolence is good for individuals, relationships, nations, and the world as a whole.

The fact that benevolence is often enlightened self-interest makes it no less warm-hearted and virtuous. And at this time in history when individuals feel increasingly stressed and isolated, when relationships often stand on shaky ground, when international conflicts are fueled by dwindling resources and increasingly lethal weapons, and when humanity is dumping over nine billions tons of carbon each year into the atmosphere (like throwing 5 billion cars a year up into the sky, most of which stay there) – benevolence is not just moral, it’s essential.

But easier said than done.

How can we sustain benevolence in ourselves and in our relationships, nations, and world?

How?
* Know what benevolence feels like in your body, heart, and mind – Bring to mind a sense of warmth and good wishes toward someone. How does this feel? Try on other kinds of benevolence, and toward other beings, to sense what these are like as well.

* Realize that benevolence is natural and normal – In the media, we are so bombarded with words and images of anti-benevolence that you can start to think that ordinary decency and kindness are somehow exotic. But in fact, as we evolved, our ancestors stayed alive and passed on their genes by caring about themselves and others. And given the gratitude and reverence for nature commonly found in hunter-gatherer bands today, they likely also cared about the world upon which they depended.

* Take care of yourself – When your core needs are met – when you’re not stressed by threat, loss, or rejection – the brain defaults to its resting state, its home base. From this home base, most people are fair-minded, empathic, cooperative, compassionate, and kind: in a word, benevolent. While it’s possible to sustain goodwill in a state of fear, frustration, or loneliness, it is sure a lot harder. An undisturbed, healthy brain is a benevolent one.

* Take a stand for benevolence – Establish your intentions formally – perhaps at the start of the day, or during a contemplative practice, or at a meal – to wish yourself and all other beings well. In challenging situations, take care of your needs while also asking yourself, “How could I be benevolent here? How could I restrain any destructive thoughts, words, or deeds? Can I wish for the welfare of others? Can I express compassion and kindness?”

* Step out of your comfort zone – Not doing anything foolish, consider how you could stretch a bit (or more) in your good intentions toward others. For example, seeing people you don’t know, try wishing them well. Or with someone who’s irritating, try looking past the surface to sense this person’s own stress and worries; without waiving your rights, can you find more patience, can you let go of recrimination or payback? Or could you extend yourself with friends or family, maybe doing more dishes or giving someone a ride? In the larger world, consider volunteering some time or giving more to a charity.

* Last, appreciate some of the benevolence that buoys you along – We’ve all been nurtured and protected by friends and family, humanity altogether, and the biosphere. In some sense, there’s an exuberant benevolence in the physical universe itself; consider that most of the atoms in your body – any that are heavier than helium – were born inside an exploding star. Afloat in these gifts, who could not be benevolent?!

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Love, Laugh, Live

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You’ll have your heart broken and you’ll break others’ hearts. You’ll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you’ll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you’ve never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone’s hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don’t be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back. – Unknown

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WORK WITH MHEYAH

 

Hello, I am so happy to connect with you. I would really enjoy hearing how I can support you to create more love, happiness and success in your life.

I am passionate about
 CONNECTING people who are feeling disconnected, misunderstood and trying to manage conflict and having relationship challenges.

Our ability to communicate with others determines the quality of our lives and directly contributes to our happiness and success in life.

I specialize in teaching people new ways to communicate & connect that creates understanding, positivity, harmony, minimizing conflict, anger, hurt and stress.  Whether you are having challenges in your personal relationships or struggling with your colleagues or not achieving the success you want professionally, I can help you create positive happier connections and teach you the skills to navigate conflict and differences that will minimize relationship stress and damage so if you are struggling don’t struggle on your own. I have added lots of resources and RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

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I am a relationship coach, counsellor, consultant, author, “AHA” facilitator and CHIEF CONNECTION OFFICER. I help people reconnect with each other.

It is human nature to need connection and LOVE in our lives and is as important as breathing, water and food.


HOW I CAN BEST SUPPORT YOU
Together let’s look at what you want to change, what you want to be different, what you need to feel happier in your life and together we will highlight your goals and I will teach you how to communicate authentically & successfully everywhere in your life so you feel confident and self assured in positive outcomes personally and professionally. We will create a vision for your life and turn it into a reality. MORE about Communication


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MY PROMISE TO YOU
my purpose & promise is to inspire you to create CLARITY, AHA moments & TRANSFORMATION, so you can have more HAPPINESS, SUCCESS & LOVE in your life

Mheyah Bailey, Vancouver coach
LETS CONNECT-BOOK YOUR DISCOVERY SESSION NOW
If you would like to connect, please book a session below

COACHING OPTIONS
One on One, either in person, or by phone or Skype
95-60 minutes
125-90 minutes

SPECIAL PREPAY PACKAGES
15 Sessions-1750 (125 savings)
10 Sessions-1150 (100 savings)
5 Sessions-675 (75 savings)

CELL: +1 778-952-4749 
EMAIL: mheyah@connectionpointcentre.com 

THE HAPPINESS PROJECT 101
SPECIALISED LIFE CHANGING COACHING PROGRAM- $2999.00
or 4 EQUAL PAYMENT PLAN OF $750 over 4 MONTHS


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bring all my life experiences to collaborating with others and a lifetime of education to support my clients in their quest for inspired lifestyles, personal change, more happiness, love & fulfillment, better relationships, purposeful lives.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it― Rumi

Love Mheyah ♥
Please connect with me and BOOK YOUR DISCOVERY SESSION BELOW

Please connect with me at
www.connectionpointcentre.com
or by email at mheyah@conectionpointcentre.com

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